From: Woe from Wit
ACT I
Scene 1
A drawing room with a large clock, on the right a door to Sophia's bedroom, from which a piano and flute can be heard, which then fall silent. Lizanka is in the middle of the room, asleep, slumped in an armchair.
(Morning, dawn is just breaking.)
Lizanka
(suddenly wakes up, rises from the armchair, looks around)
It's getting light!.. Ah! how quickly the night has passed!
Yesterday I begged to sleep—refused.
"We're waiting for a friend."—One must keep watch,
Don't sleep, lest you tumble from your chair.
Now I've just dozed off,
And it's already day!.. I must tell them...
(Knocks at Sophia's door.)
Master, mistress,
Hey! Sophia Pavlovna, trouble!
Your conversation has gone on all night.
Are you deaf?—Alexei Stepanych!
Madam!—And fear doesn't take them!
(Steps away from the door.)
Well, an uninvited guest,
Perhaps the master will come in!
This is what it means to serve a lady in love!
(Again at the door.)
Do part now. It's morning.—What, sir?
Sophia's voice
What time is it?
Lizanka
The whole house has risen.
Sophia
(from her room)
What time is it?
Lizanka
Seven, eight, nine.
Sophia
(from the same place)
That's not true.
Lizanka
(away from the door)
Ah! cursed Cupid!
They hear but won't understand,
Well, what if I remove their shutters?
I'll reset the clock, though I know there'll be trouble,
I'll make them play.
(Climbs on a chair, moves the hand, the clock strikes and plays.)
Scene 2
Liza and Famusov.
Liza
Ah! Master!
Famusov
Master, yes.
(Stops the clock's music.)
What a little mischief-maker you are, girl.
I couldn't figure out what the trouble was!
Now I hear a flute, now something like a piano;
For Sophia it would be too early?..
Liza
No, sir, I... just accidentally...
Famusov
That's just it, accidentally, one must watch you;
So, surely, with intention.
(Presses close to her and flirts.)
Oh! what a minx, you naughty thing.
Liza
You're the naughty one, does this behavior suit you!
Famusov
Modest, yet nothing but
Pranks and wind in your head.
Liza
Let go, you're the frivolous ones,
Come to your senses, you're old men...
Famusov
Almost.
Liza
Well, what if someone comes, where will we be?
Famusov
Who would come here?
Sophia is asleep, isn't she?
Liza
She just went to bed.
Famusov
Just now! And the night?
Liza
She read all night.
Famusov
Look at these whims that have started!
Liza
All in French, aloud, locked in.
Famusov
Tell her it's not good to ruin her eyes,
And reading doesn't bring much benefit:
She can't sleep from French books,
And Russian ones make me terribly sleepy.
Liza
When she gets up, I'll report,
Please go now, you'll wake her, I'm afraid.
Famusov
Why wake her? You yourself wind the clock,
You thunder a symphony for the whole neighborhood.
Liza
(as loud as possible)
Oh, come now, sir!
Famusov
(covers her mouth)
Mercy, how you shout.
Have you lost your mind?
Liza
I'm afraid something might come of this...
Famusov
What?
Liza
It's time you knew, sir, you're not a child;
Young ladies have such light morning sleep;
The door creaks slightly, you whisper softly:
They hear everything...
Famusov
You're lying.
Sophia's voice
Hey, Liza!
Famusov
(hurriedly)
Shh!
(Steals out of the room on tiptoe.)
Liza
(alone)
He's gone... Ah! keep away from masters;
With them one must be ready for trouble every hour,
God save us from all sorrows,
From the master's anger and the master's love.
Scene 3
Liza, Sophia with a candle, followed by Molchalin.
Sophia
What's gotten into you, Liza?
Making noise...
Liza
Of course, it's hard for you to part?
Locked in till dawn, and it still seems too little?
Sophia
Ah, it really has grown light!
(Extinguishes the candle.)
Both light and sadness. How quickly the nights pass!
Liza
You grieve, I know, I can't bear it from the sidelines,
Your father came in here, I nearly died;
I turned about before him, don't remember what lies I told;
Well, what are you standing for? Make your bow, sir.
Go, my heart's not in place;
Look at the clock, glance out the window:
People have been streaming down the streets for ages;
And in the house there's knocking, walking, sweeping and tidying.
Sophia
The happy don't watch the clock.
Liza
Don't watch them, it's your power;
But what answer for you, of course, I'll get.
Sophia
(To Molchalin)
Go; we'll endure boredom all day yet.
Liza
God be with you, sir; take your hand away.
(Separates them, Molchalin collides with Famusov in the doorway.)
Scene 4
Sophia, Liza, Molchalin, Famusov.
Famusov
What an occurrence! Molchalin, you, brother?
Molchalin
Yes, sir.
Famusov
Why are you here? and at this hour?
And Sophia!.. Good morning, Sophia, why
Have you risen so early! eh? for what concern?
And how did God bring you together at such an inopportune time?
Sophia
He just came in now.
Molchalin
Just from a walk.
Famusov
Friend, couldn't you for your walks
Choose a more distant corner?
And you, madam, barely out of bed you spring,
With a man! a young one!—An occupation for a girl!
All night reading nonsense,
And here are the fruits of those books!
It's all Kuznetsky Bridge, and those eternal French,
From there come fashions to us, and authors, and muses:
Destroyers of purses and hearts!
When will the Creator deliver us
From their hats! bonnets! pins! and hairpins!
And bookshops and pastry shops!..
Sophia
Forgive me, father, my head is spinning;
I can barely catch my breath from fright;
You rushed in so swiftly,
I was confused...
Famusov
I humbly thank you,
I rushed in quickly to them!
I interfered! I frightened!
I, Sophia Pavlovna, am upset myself, all day
No rest, I rush about as if possessed.
With duties, with service, fussing,
One pesters me, another, everyone's business concerns me!
But did I expect new troubles? to be deceived...
Sophia
(through tears)
By whom, father?
Famusov
Now they'll reproach me,
That I always scold without reason.
Don't cry, I speak the truth:
As for you, have I not cared
For your upbringing! from the cradle!
Mother died: I managed to hire
In Madame Rosier a second mother.
I assigned an old golden woman to supervise you:
She was clever, gentle-natured, of rare principles.
One thing doesn't do her credit:
For an extra five hundred rubles a year
She allowed herself to be lured away by others.
But it's not Madame's fault.
One needs no other example,
When father's example is before one's eyes.
Look at me: I don't boast of my constitution,
Yet I'm vigorous and fresh, and have lived to gray hair;
Free, widowed, I am my own master...
Known for monastic behavior!..
Liza
I dare, sir...
Famusov
Silence!
Terrible age! Don't know what to do!
Everyone has grown too wise for their years.
And daughters especially, and we ourselves are good souls,
These languages have been our undoing!
We take in vagabonds, into the house, and by tickets,
To teach our daughters everything, everything—
Dancing! and singing! and tenderness! and sighs!
As if we're preparing them to marry jesters.
You, visitor, what? you here, sir, for what?
I warmed up a nobody and brought him into my family,
Gave him the rank of assessor and took him as secretary;
Transferred to Moscow through my assistance;
And if not for me, you'd be languishing in Tver.
Sophia
I cannot understand your anger at all.
He lives here in the house, what a calamity!
He was going to his room, got into another.
Famusov
Got in or wanted to get in?
And why together? It can't be accidental.
Sophia
Here's what the whole incident was:
Just as earlier you were here with Liza,
Your voice frightened me extraordinarily,
And I rushed here with all my might...
Famusov
Perhaps she'll blame all the commotion on me.
My voice alarmed them at the wrong time!
Sophia
After a troubled dream trifles disturb.
Let me tell you the dream: then you'll understand.
Famusov
What kind of story?
Sophia
Shall I tell you?
Famusov
Well yes.
(Sits down.)
Sophia
Allow me... you see... at first
A flowery meadow; and I was looking for
Some kind of herb, I can't remember what when awake.
Suddenly a dear person, one of those whom we
See—as if we've known them forever,
Appeared there with me; both ingratiating and clever,
But timid... You know, one born in poverty...
Famusov
Ah! mother, don't complete the blow!
Whoever is poor is no match for you.
Sophia
Then everything disappeared: meadows and skies.—
We're in a dark room. To complete the miracle
The floor opened—and you from there
Pale as death, and hair standing on end!
Then with thunder doors burst open
Some creatures neither people nor beasts
Separated us—and tortured the one sitting with me.
He seems dearer to me than all treasures,
I want to go to him—you drag me away with you:
We're accompanied by moaning, roaring, laughter, monstrous whistling!
He cries out after me!..
I woke up.—Someone is speaking,—
It was your voice; what, I think, so early?
I run here—and find you both.
Famusov
Yes, it's a bad dream; as I look at it.
Here's everything, if there's no deception:
Both devils, and love, and fears, and flowers.
Well, my dear sir, and you?
Molchalin
I heard your voice.
Famusov
Amusing.
They're obsessed with my voice, and how properly
Everyone hears it, and it summons everyone before dawn!
You hurried to my voice, why then?—speak.
Molchalin
With papers, sir.
Famusov
Yes! Those were lacking.
Mercy, what suddenly came over you
This zeal for written business!
(Rises.)
Well, Sonyushka, I'll give you peace:
Dreams are strange, but reality is stranger;
You were looking for herbs,
You came upon a friend more quickly;
Get this nonsense out of your head;
Where there are miracles, there's little sense.—
Go on, lie down, sleep again.
(To Molchalin.)
Let's go sort papers.
Molchalin
I only brought them for report,
That they can't be put into action without references, without others,
There are contradictions, and much is not sound.
Famusov
I fear one thing mortally, sir,
That they don't accumulate in multitude;
Give you free rein, and they would pile up;
But with me, whether business or not business,
My custom is this:
Once signed, off my shoulders.
(Leaves with Molchalin, letting him pass first in the doorway.)
Scene 5
Sophia, Liza.
Liza
Well, there's your holiday! there's your fun!
However no, now it's not a laughing matter;
It's dark before my eyes, and my soul has frozen;
Sin is no misfortune, but gossip is bad.
Sophia
What's gossip to me? Whoever wants, let them judge,
But father will make me think:
Grumbling, restless, quick,
Always so, but since this time...
You can judge...
Liza
I judge, sir, not by tales;
He'll lock you up;—it's still well for me;
But otherwise, God forbid, all at once
Me, Molchalin and everyone thrown out.
Sophia
When you think, how capricious fortune is!
It happens worse, it will pass;
When sad thoughts don't come to mind,
Lost in music, and time flowed so smoothly;
Fate seemed to protect us;
No worry, no doubt...
But grief waits around the corner.
Liza
That's just it, sir, my foolish judgment
You never favor:
And now here's trouble.
What better prophet do you need?
I kept saying: there will be no good in this love
Not ever.
Like all Muscovites, your father is such:
He'd like a son-in-law with stars and ranks,
And with stars not all are rich, between us;
Well, naturally, along with that
Money too, to live on, so he could give balls;
Here, for example, Colonel Skalozub:
Both a money bag, and aiming for general.
Sophia
How charming! and it's terribly amusing for me
To listen about the front and ranks;
He's never uttered a clever word,—
It's all the same to me, marrying him or jumping in water.
Liza
Yes, sir, so to speak, eloquent, but terribly not clever;
But be he military, be he civil,
Who is so sensitive, and cheerful, and sharp,
As Alexander Andreich Chatsky!
Not to upset you;
It's long past, can't be returned,
But I remember...
Sophia
What do you remember? He splendidly
Can mock everyone;
He chatters, jokes, it's amusing to me;
One can share laughter with anyone.
Liza
And that's all? really?—He was in tears,
I remember, poor thing, when he parted from you.—
"What, sir, are you crying? live laughing..."
And he answered: "Not without reason, Liza, I cry:
Who knows what I'll find on my return?
And how much, perhaps, I'll lose!"
Poor thing seemed to know, that in three years...
Sophia
Listen, don't take liberties.
I acted very frivolously, perhaps,
And I know it, and blame myself; but where did I betray?
Whom? that they could reproach me with infidelity.
Yes, with Chatsky, truly, we were raised, grew up together;
The habit of being together every day inseparably
Bound us in childhood friendship; but then
He moved away, it seemed boring to him with us,
And rarely visited our house;
Then again he pretended to be in love,
Demanding and aggrieved!!
Sharp, clever, eloquent,
Especially fortunate in friends,
He thought highly of himself...
The desire to wander seized him,
Ah! if one loves someone,
Why seek intelligence and travel so far?
Liza
Where does he roam? in what lands?
They say he took the cure at mineral waters,
Not from illness, I suppose, from boredom,—more freely.
Sophia
And, surely, he's happy there, where people are more ridiculous.
The one I love is not like that:
Molchalin is ready to forget himself for others,
Enemy of boldness,—always bashful, timid,
One can spend a whole night with him!
We sit, and outside it's long been light,
What do you think? what are we occupied with?
Liza
God knows,
Madam, is it my business?
Sophia
He takes my hand, presses it to his heart,
Sighs from the depths of his soul,
Not a bold word, and so the whole night passes,
Hand in hand, and his eyes don't leave me.—
You're laughing! how can you! what cause have I given
You for such laughter?
Liza
Me, sir?.. your aunt just came to mind,
When the young Frenchman ran away from her house,
Dear lady! she wanted to hide
Her vexation, didn't manage:
Forgot to dye her hair black,
And in three days turned gray.
(Continues laughing.)
Sophia
(with chagrin)
That's just how they'll talk about me later.
Liza
Forgive me, truly, as God is holy,
I wanted this foolish laughter
To cheer you up a bit.
(They leave.)
Scene 6
Sophia, Liza, Servant, followed by Chatsky.
Servant
Alexander Andreich Chatsky to see you.
(Leaves.)
Scene 7
Sophia, Liza, Chatsky.
Chatsky
Barely dawn and already up! and I at your feet.
(Ardently kisses her hand.)
Well kiss me then, you weren't expecting me? speak!
What, are you glad? No? Look me in the face.
Surprised? and only that? what a reception!
As if not a week has passed;
As if yesterday together
We were unbearably tired of each other;
Not a hair of love! how lovely!
And meanwhile, I don't remember, without soul,
I rushed forty-five hours, not closing my eyes for a moment,
Over seven hundred versts—wind, storm;
And I'm completely disheveled, and fell how many times—
And here's the reward for my exploits!
Sophia
Ah! Chatsky, I'm very glad to see you.
Chatsky
You're glad? good for you.
But honestly, who rejoices like that?
It seems to me, that finally
Chilling people and horses,
I only amused myself.
Liza
Here, sir, if you'd been behind the doors,
By God, not five minutes ago,
We were speaking of you here.
Madam, tell him yourself.—
Sophia
Always, not only now.—
You can't reproach me.
Whoever flashes by, opens a door,
Passing through, by chance, from elsewhere, from afar—
With a question I, even if it's a sailor:
Haven't you met him somewhere in a post carriage?
Chatsky
Let's suppose so.
Blessed is he who believes, warm is his world!—
Ah! my God! am I really here again,
In Moscow! with you! how can I recognize you!
Where is that time? where is that innocent age,
When, it used to be, on a long evening
We would appear with you, disappear here and there,
Playing and making noise on chairs and tables.
And there's your father with madame, at piquet;
We in a dark corner, and it seems, in this very one!
You remember? we'd shudder when a table creaks, a door...
Sophia
Childishness!
Chatsky
Yes, sir, but now,
At seventeen you've blossomed charmingly,
Inimitably, and you know it,
And therefore are modest, don't look at the world.
Aren't you in love? I ask you to give me an answer,
Without thinking, stop being embarrassed.
Sophia
Why, anyone would be embarrassed
By rapid questions and a curious gaze...
Chatsky
Forgive me, not you, what is there to be surprised at?
What new thing will Moscow show me?
Yesterday there was a ball, tomorrow there will be two.
One courted—succeeded, another failed.
All the same talk, and the same verses in albums.
Sophia
Persecution of Moscow. What does seeing the world mean!
Where is it better?
Chatsky
Where we are not.
Well, what of your father? still of the English Club
An old, faithful member to the grave?
Has your uncle danced out his years?
And that one, what's his name, is he Turk or Greek?
That dark-skinned one, on crane's legs,
I don't know what his name is,
Wherever you go: there he is,
In dining rooms and drawing rooms.
And those three from the boulevard crowd,
Who've been acting young for half a century?
They have a million relatives, and with the help of sisters
They'll be related to all Europe.
And our sunshine? our treasure?
Written on his forehead: Theater and Masquerade;
House painted green like a grove,
He himself is fat, his artists are thin.
At the ball, remember, we discovered together
Behind screens, in one of the more secret rooms,
A man was hidden and trilled like a nightingale,
A singer of summer weather in winter.
And that consumptive one, your relation, enemy of books,
Who settled in the learned committee
And with shouting demanded oaths,
That no one should know or learn literacy?
Again I'm fated by fate to see them!
Living with them becomes tedious, and in whom won't you find flaws?
But when you've wandered, you return home,
And the smoke of the Fatherland is sweet and pleasant to us!
Sophia
I should bring you together with auntie,
To enumerate all acquaintances.
Chatsky
And auntie? still a maiden, a Minerva?
Still a lady-in-waiting of Catherine the First?
Full house of pupils and lapdogs?
Ah! let's move on to education.
Is it now, as in ancient times,
They rush to gather teachers in regiments,
In greater number, at cheaper price?
Not that they're far in science;
In Russia, under great penalty,
We're ordered to recognize everyone
As historian and geographer!
Our mentor, remember his cap, his robe,
Index finger, all signs of learning,
How they troubled our timid minds,
How from an early age we learned to believe,
That without Germans there's no salvation for us!—
And Guillaume, the Frenchman, flighty fellow?
He's not married yet?
Sophia
To whom?
Chatsky
To some princess at least,
Pulkheria Andreevna, for example?
Sophia
A dancing master! how could you!
Chatsky
Why? he's a gentleman too.
They'll require from us property and rank,
And Guillaume!.. — Here now what's the tone
At gatherings, at large ones, on holidays?
Does the mixture of languages still reign:
French with Nizhny Novgorod?
Sophia
Mixture of languages?
Chatsky
Yes, of two, how else can it be.
Liza
But it's hard to fashion one from them, like yours.
Chatsky
At least, not pompous.
Here's news!—I'm using the moment,
Enlivened by meeting with you,
And talkative; but aren't there times,
When I'm stupider than Molchalin? Where is he, by the way?
Has he still not broken the seal of silence?
It used to be, where he'd see a notebook of new songs
He'd pester: please copy it.
But otherwise, he'll reach well-known ranks,
After all, nowadays they love the wordless.
Sophia
(aside)
Not a man, a snake!
(Loudly and forcedly.)
I want to ask you:
Has it ever happened that you, laughing? or in sorrow?
By mistake? said something good about someone?
If not now, then in childhood, perhaps.
Chatsky
When everything was so soft? and tender, and immature?
Why so long ago? here's a good deed for you:
Just jingling with bells
Day and night through the snowy desert,
I rush to you headlong.
And how do I find you? in some stern manner!
I've endured half an hour of coldness!
The face of a most holy pilgrim!..
And still I love you madly.—
(A moment's silence.)
Listen, are all my words really barbed?
And do they tend to someone's harm?
But if so: mind and heart are not in harmony.
I'll laugh at some oddity once in a while
And then forget:
Command me into fire: I'll go as to dinner.
Sophia
Yes, good—burn, but what if you don't?
Scene 8
Sophia, Liza, Chatsky, Famusov.
Famusov
Here's another one!
Sophia
Ah, father, the dream came true.
(Leaves.)
Famusov
(after her in an undertone)
Cursed dream.
Scene 9
Famusov, Chatsky (looks at the door through which Sophia left).
Famusov
Well, you've played a trick!
Three years you didn't write two words!
And burst in suddenly, as if from the clouds.
(They embrace.)
Hello, friend, hello, brother, hello.
Tell me, I suppose you have ready
An important collection of news?
Sit down, announce it quickly.
(They sit down.)
Chatsky
(distractedly)
How Sophia Pavlovna has grown prettier!
Famusov
You young people, you have no other business,
Than noticing girls' beauty:
She said something in passing, and you,
I suppose, have been carried away with hopes, bewitched.
Chatsky
Ah! no, I'm little spoiled by hopes.
Famusov
"Dream came true" she deigned to whisper to me.
There you've conceived...
Chatsky
I?—Not at all.
Famusov
Who was she dreaming about? what was it?
Chatsky
I'm no interpreter of dreams.
Famusov
Don't believe her, it's all empty.
Chatsky
I believe my own eyes;
I've never met, I'll sign a pledge,
Anything even slightly like her!
Famusov
He's all his own. But tell me in detail,
Where were you? wandered so many years!
Where from now?
Chatsky
Now is that what concerns me!
I wanted to travel the whole world,
And didn't travel a hundredth part.
(Rises hastily.)
Forgive me; I hurried to see you sooner,
Didn't stop at home. Farewell! In an hour
I'll appear, won't forget the smallest detail;
To you first, then you tell everyone everywhere.
(In the doorway.)
How beautiful she is!
(Leaves.)
Scene 10
Famusov
(alone)
Which one of the two?
"Ah! father, the dream came true!"
And she tells me this aloud!
Well, I'm guilty! What a roundabout way I took!
Molchalin earlier put me in doubt.
Now... from the frying pan into the fire:
That one's a pauper, this one's a dandy friend;
Declared a spendthrift, a scapegrace;
What a commission, Creator,
To be a grown daughter's father!
(Leaves.)
End of Act I