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Franz Kafka gets called into HR for his annual performance review. HR Manager: 'Franz, your productivity reports are... concerning. You wrote that you spent six months turning into a bug?' Kafka: 'Metaphorically.' HR Manager: 'And this expense report claims you were arrested but never told why?' Kafka: 'Also metaphorically.' HR Manager: 'Franz, this is an insurance company. We need literal reports.' Kafka: 'That's the most terrifying thing you've ever said to me.'

The Fiction section overheard the Self-Help books having a group therapy session. 'I feel like I'm always giving but never receiving,' sobbed 'How to Set Boundaries.' 'Nobody ever finishes me,' wept 'The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People.' 'I keep getting returned,' sniffled 'Letting Go of Attachment.' The Fiction section whispered to Poetry: 'Should we tell them the irony, or let them figure it out on their own?' Poetry shrugged: 'Give it / a few / stanzas.'