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Dostoevsky joins a modern book club. The host cheerfully announces: 'This month we're reading a light beach read!' Dostoevsky raises his hand: 'I have a suggestion. It's about a man who murders an elderly woman with an axe, then spends 500 pages in psychological torment questioning the nature of morality and human suffering.' The room falls silent. 'It's only 671 pages,' he adds helpfully. 'I cut out two existential crises and a fever dream to keep it breezy.'

A book club spent six months reading 'Being and Nothingness' by Sartre. At their final meeting, the host asked everyone to share their thoughts. After twenty minutes of complete silence, one member finally spoke: 'I think the silence IS our discussion.' Another nodded gravely: 'The void speaks louder than words.' The host checked her notes and realized they'd accidentally grabbed the wrong book—they were supposed to read a cozy mystery about a cat detective. No one had noticed because they assumed the confusion was intentional.