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'Your prose is extraordinary. The imagery, the rhythm — who are your influences?'
'Kafka, Borges, Márquez.'
'Sir, this is a parking ticket appeal. The judge asked why you were parked in a fire lane.'
'...I was waiting for my muse.'
'Denied.'
A group of nouns staged an intervention for their adjective friend. 'You have a problem,' said Table firmly. 'Every time you describe something, you bring fourteen of your cousins along.' The adjective looked around the room—at the concerned, worried, troubled, anxious, distressed, uneasy, and apprehensive faces—and whispered, 'I can stop whenever I want.' Behind her, Thesaurus nodded enthusiastically, vigorously, and with great fervor.
A passive voice construction finally went to therapy. 'I feel like I'm never the one doing anything,' it complained. 'Actions are always being done by me, but I'm never doing them myself. My self-esteem has been destroyed.' The therapist nodded thoughtfully. 'And how does that make you feel?' The passive voice sighed. 'Feelings are being felt by me, but honestly, I couldn't tell you which ones.'
'Your prose is extraordinary. The imagery, the rhythm — who are your influences?' 'Kafka, Borges, Márquez.' 'Sir, this is a parking ticket appeal. The judge asked why you were parked in a fire lane.' '...I was waiting for my muse.' 'Denied.'
A group of nouns staged an intervention for their adjective friend. 'You have a problem,' said Table firmly. 'Every time you describe something, you bring fourteen of your cousins along.' The adjective looked around the room—at the concerned, worried, troubled, anxious, distressed, uneasy, and apprehensive faces—and whispered, 'I can stop whenever I want.' Behind her, Thesaurus nodded enthusiastically, vigorously, and with great fervor.
A passive voice construction finally went to therapy. 'I feel like I'm never the one doing anything,' it complained. 'Actions are always being done by me, but I'm never doing them myself. My self-esteem has been destroyed.' The therapist nodded thoughtfully. 'And how does that make you feel?' The passive voice sighed. 'Feelings are being felt by me, but honestly, I couldn't tell you which ones.'
Nothing to read? Create your own book and read it! Like I do.
Create a book"Write with the door closed, rewrite with the door open." — Stephen King
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